A trying day.  I almost tuned over the tractor trying to get and employee out of a ditch.  The gravel under the left tire just came loose.  It was the closest I have ever been to having it go over on me.  I had to lean out to the right and it slowly came back down and the rear tire touched down.  I was precariously balanced like that for about 3 or 4 minutes as I ever so gently (while leaning) wiggled my way into a more stable position.  I am reminded that farming is dangerous.

The road on the other side of the creek is a mess... as I expected.  I wish I had a bigger tractor.  Praise God I have one at all and that it’s running at the moment.  I got a start in the dark with headlights smoothing it out to get a jump on the morning.  I will need to be up around 5:30 tomorrow to be ready for the crew.

I am in a position of such total dependence upon God and the mercy of others at the moment that I am struck by how much I rely on myself.  Perhaps this is exactly where God wants me to be... to learn to depend upon Him wholly.  I am remionded by my Pastor in my head saying "focus on what God's trying to teach you in the trial."  Wise words, but it's hard.  I am scared that this could ruin us.  We desperately need people to honor their commitments to the farm... to support us during this time, even if our deliveries are terrible.  If people walk away because it is going to be a tough start to the year, we will sink.  All I have now is prayer.

So we walk into the unknown and lean on him.  I was supposed to preach Psalm 23 tonight at church... isn't that irony?  I'll put it hear for you to read... it has brought me comfort today.

Psalm 23:1-6 (NASB95) A Psalm of David.
1  The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures; He leads me beside quiet waters.
3 He restores my soul; He guides me in the paths of righteousness For His name’s sake.
4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; You have anointed my head with oil; My cup overflows.
6 Surely goodness and lovingkindness will follow me all the days of my life, And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever.

^{... and this is one of the last things I saw today.}